Hey everyone! For those of you who don't know, every year for 4th wave at ASOM, there is such a thing called '4th Wave Missons'. This is where we set aside an entire wave (roughly about 6-7 weeks) to various ministries across the world and even here in the U.S.! We have teams going to Australia, India, Africa, California, Midwest, Louisiana, and there was a corporate team, but they decided to remove that option.
The selection process started with each student writing down their top three choices of where they felt God was leading them to go. These papers were collected and prayerfully considered by all of staff. A few weeks later, the teams were formed. Each student was given an envelope with their name on it and a colored square in it. This colored square led to a picture on one of the walls in the sanctuary. On the back of the picture was the name of our location.
I received my envelope with my name on it. I began opening it with my best friend Jordyn next to me.
"It's blue! Your color is blue!" She said.
"What? No way.. There's no way it's blue." I denied because I knew what that meant. I didn't want to believe what that meant. What it meant was something scary to me. You'll know why as you keep reading.
I opened the envelope. Inside there was exactly what Jordyn said; a blue square. I looked to where the blue card meant. It was a picture of water taped to the sound booth in the back of the sanctuary. And there stood Becca, a girl I knew would be leading/co-leading the trip. I'm not sure what to feel. I feel overwhelmed and as if I'm about to pass out. This trip by no means would be cheap.
Five of us gather around the blue picture. At the count of three we're allowed to turn over the image and be clearly revealed where we are to go. One... Two... Three!
Now, I know my God is the true provider. I know $4,000 is pocket change compared to the mega banks He owns, but for little me living in Atlanta, and not having a normal job to help pay for this tremendously generating some serious fear. After a while I accept the fact that if this is where God wants me to go, He will provide. I rested in that. I reminded myself of that.
However, because I don't have my first year paid off quite yet, I've been informed of a new opportunity. The Corporate Team was added back and I was now selected to be a part of that. Let me tell you... I struggled so hard to maintain a good attitude about being taken off Australia (trip of my dreams) and moved to staying state side. I told God over and over again that I wanted to have a genuinely good attitude towards this change. After all, I'm in love with God and whatever He wants me to do, say, or go, you better believe I'm going to do just that.
On the flip side, I did get a little upset at this news. I thought to myself, "Man, what the heck, God? First you call me to a trip so impossible and now you take it away and send me to work until my feet don't want to be feet anymore. Why did you do this?" I realized I began to become almost bitter about this. And this behavior was not something I wanted to rule over this situation. God gives AND takes away. But that doesn't make Him a bad God.
I soon repented of my bitterness and asked over and over for Him to create in me a spirit that was happy about this opportunity. That I now get the chance to stay somewhere super nice (from what I'm told), work closer with people who need to hear about Jesus in the workforce, pay off my tuition, and, if I'm fortunate enough, make some tips so I might continue living this missionary life. Also, if I pay off my current tuition, the funds raised while working will automatically go towards my next year of school! Not only that, but this doesn't cost anything extra!
The more I focus on that, the less I focus on what I want. I'm sure I'll go to Australia one day, but for now, I'm content with going wherever the Lord says, "Go."
Thanks for reading this post and being a part of this journey with me!😄
~Samantha
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